DI I CHEAT? PHUCK NO! I JUST HOT SMARTER
Even if they are starving, natives living in the Arctic will never eat a penguin's egg. Why not?
Penguins are native to Antarctica.
Forward I am heavy, but backward I am not. What am I?
A ton.
He has married many women, but has never been married. Who is he?
A priest.
How are a jeweler and a jailer alike?
The jeweler sells watches and the jailer watches cells.
How many bricks does it take to complete a building made of brick?
Only one - the "last" one
I'm not an airplane, but I can fly through the sky. I'm not a river, but I'm full of water. What am I?
A cloud.
In a tunnel of darkness lies a beast of iron. It can only attack when pulled back. What is it?
A bullet.
In Okmulgee, Oklahoma, you cannot take a picture of a man with a wooden leg. Why not?
You can't take a picture with a wooden leg! You need a camera.
In what year did Christmas Day and New Year's Day fall in the same year?
It happens every year.
Is an old hundred dollar bill better than a new one?
It's 99 dollars better!